Three tips for self-care

Today, I had an opportunity to talk about three tips about self-care with my team and wanted to share the written version of the talk.

First, what is self-care?  For me, self-care is a way to nurture myself so I can achieve the highest expression of myself in all areas of life.  And when we achieve the highest expression of ourselves, we have the highest fulfillment.

There are so many ways to nurture yourself, just to name a few, eating well, sleeping well, staying hydrated, playing and laughing, setting a clear boundary by saying no, etc.  Through this, I want to highlight three ways, with focus on body, mind and connections.

First tip is about our body. Stay connected with our body through movement.  When we are stressed, we tend to live in our head and forget about the body. Yet the body has so much wisdom. The term “the gut feeling” is literally a felt sensation in the gut that has intuitive intelligence.  To connect with our body, you can gently and naturally move your body. My favorite is to take a walk in nature as I can then also let myself be touched by the beauty of nature.  Unfortunately during this time where we cannot go outside, I do yoga, stretching and take a hot bath at home.

Second tip is about our mind. Send loving kindness to ourselves.  This comes from Mindful Self-Compassion developed by Kristin Neff. Everyone here is a high achiever. A lot of high performers tend to have a strong inner critic. Earlier I mentioned that I love a walk in nature as I find that restorative.  When that is not an option given the poor air quality in San Francisco as I am writing this, I notice that I am deeply impacted and as a result, I feel unsettled. With Self Compassion, instead of criticizing, blaming or suppressing, I notice my suffering and send loving kindness to myself.  I soothe myself as if I am soothing a baby or a dear friend or my favorite pet. I tell myself  “It’s OK to feel frustrated and afraid. I am here for you.” And I repeat this until it really sinks in. This helps to calm my nervous system so that I can face the reality from a place that is more grounded.   

Last self-care tip is about connections. We all know that meaningful connections are critical to our health and happiness. During a pandemic when we are forced to be isolated, I’ve become intentional about building a nourishing network of support for myself.  I make sure that I talk to two friends every week.  I connect with them from my heart, and the best way to do so is to express gratitude and appreciation. On the days I was in a funk, I dragged myself to say “I guess I have clean water and I am grateful for that.” And we laughed. The feeling of being seen and heard through an authentic connection is energizing beyond our imagination.   

Hope this is helpful for everyone as we are going through some of the unprecedented time in the world.  And feel free to reach out to me if you have any feedback or questions!  I always love connecting with people.